As I am studying for my midterms, I paused and went to medium to find your article. I am 23. The last 4 years of my life I let life happend to me. I stumbled, I hated myself, and I lived in shame and guilt for so long. I got drunk almost every two weeks, go on so many tinder dates to search for validation from others. Last year I decide to go to therapy. I am still trying to get out of the low self steem, lack of self worth, poor boundaries. I am definitely progressing, slowly but surely. And one of the things I have to remind my self it is that I am not a victim. I am in control and I am the only one responsible for the life I wanted. Your article is definitely something I felt it was directly to me, as these days some of my old habits have been wanting to re-appear so I have been struggling. From the bottom of my heart, thanks for your writing.